The problem lay buried, unspoken, for many years in the minds of American women. It was a strange stirring, a sense of dissatisfaction, a yearning that women suffered in the middle of the 20th century in the United States. Each suburban wife struggled with it alone. As she made the beds, shopped for groceries, matched slipcover material, ate peanut butter sandwiches with her children, chauffeured Cub Scouts and Brownies, lay beside her husband at night-she was afraid to ask even of herself the silent question-”Is this all?”

With that question, the legendary feminist Betty Friedan ignited the women’s movement in her landmark 1963 book, “The Feminine Mystique.”

Millions of women were inspired by Friedan and other feminist leaders to launch careers outside the home. They became the first generation of successful career women, identifying themselves as much through work as they did through family, friends or other activities.

Today these women are in their mid-60s or early 70s, and they’re retiring. Many of them are again asking themselves Friedan’s famous question-but with a new perspective.

For Helen Dennis, it’s a fascinating question. An expert on aging, employment and retirement, she’s the co-author-with marriage and family therapist Bernice Bratter-of Project Renewment: The First Retirement Model for Career Women (Scribner, 2008). The book explores the identity struggle career women face as they move into a new phase of life, based in part on the dialogue of Project Renewment support groups the authors have helped start in Southern California.

“This is a generation of women asking the hard questions,” Dennis says. “After fitting into an established role, they are now finding there is no role model for where they want to go next. This is the first time in history that so many career women have faced a future that they haven’t quite figured out.”

Dennis and Brattner wrote their book for the “Silent Generation”-women who were the first large group to enter the workforce-and for the 40 million Baby Boomer women coming along toward retirement right behind them. Dennis is the first to admit that men also struggle to redefine themselves after leaving their primary careers behind, but she believes the issues women face are unique and need to addressed-urgently.

“Career women have not been on radar screen,” she says. “I’ve worked with 10,000 employees through retirement education programs since the mid 1970s, and career women have not been a focus because the assumption is that they’re the same as everyone else. The issues may be the same, but they go about it very differently than men.”

Project Renewment got its start as a series of meetings among women in Southern California close to retirement who were looking to connect with others asking themselves questions about their next phase in life. The authors made up the term “renewment” as an alternative to “retirement,” a word they believe conjures up negative stereotypes and cliches.

Other successful women’s retirement networks also have sprung up; a notable example is The Transition Network, a group with more than 2,500 women as members, mainly in the New York City area but with chapters in a handful of other cities.

Dennis advises women to consider the following cornerstone themes of the Project Renewment model as they weigh retirement decisions:

Change takes time. “It’s unrealistic to think you’ll leave your career and three days later it will be clear to you what the next chapter looks like,” Dennis says. “We work with women who highly identify themselves with work, and feel passionate about it. So, this takes time.”

Focus on finance. “Money is a keystone-you have to be able to afford the changes you want to make.” While her book really isn’t a financial guide, it does address some high-level questions career women should be asking themselves about their financial preparation for life transition.

Find your identity. As professional identity melts away, the transition to a new self-image can be rocky. “This is the big one,” says Dennis. “What has been your identity and what will be your new one? Who are you without your business card?

Redefine productivity. “We’re a work-oriented society with a Puritan ethic. But productivity is only part of what we’re worth. So when you leave the workplace, what does it mean to be productive? Do we let the external environment dictate that or does the definition come from within?”

Relationships. “Say you are married, and your husband retires before you do. How does that work out? You might be reaching your peak because you entered the labor force later.

New friends. “If you’ve been busy with your career and driven by work, your best friends probably come through your job. How do you go about making new friends at age 64?

Resources: An interview with Helen Dennis

Tags | Career, retirement, women